Musings and Other Nonsense. Whimsical stories, poems and songs for children. Written and read by Peter G. Reynolds. That's me! This podcast would not be possible without your support. Please visit buymeacoffee.com/musings to donate or become a member.
This story is called Mr. Stink
I have a best friend,
His name’s Mr. Stink.
His smell is so bad
It can be hard to think.
He’s always beside me,
It won’t matter where;
Except in the bathroom
He never goes there.
He doesn’t like soap.
Shampoo makes him mad.
Forget about toothpaste,
He says it tastes bad.
He only wears clothes,
With at least fourteen stains,
And it doesn’t matter
If someone complains.
His hair is a mess,
But he doesn’t care,
And don't get me started
On his underwear!
Now you might wonder when
Mr. Stink came to stay.
Well, it happened you see
On a rainy, Monday.
Sunday is bath time.
That’s when I get clean.
Mother will force me,
Which I think is quite mean.
But that week I lied
To avoid mother’s wrath,
And just ran the water
Instead of taking a bath.
Then sprinkled some water
On top of my head,
Combed it all back
And jumped into bed.
I awoke the next day,
And saw by my door,
A little boy who
Hadn’t been there before.
“Hello”, said the boy,
“My name’s Mr. Stink.”
He patted my back
And gave me a wink.
I looked at him closely
And thought, how can this be?
Mr. Stink looked almost
Exactly like me.
It was kind of like having
A real smelly brother.
I just had to hide him
From father and mother.
We played stinks and ladders,
At least twice a week.
We played show and smell.
We played hide and reek.
But the most favourite game
Mr. Stink liked to play,
Was how we could both
Stay dirty that day.
Turn your socks inside out,
Your underwear too.
Don’t brush your teeth.
He knew just what to do.
Skip all baths and showers.
The more times the better.
Cover all shirt stains
With a big bulky sweater.
My smell got so bad
Everyone stayed away,
And even the dog
Would not come and play.
My parents got angry,
They could not comprehend,
Why Mr. Stink was
My very best friend.
They asked, then they ordered,
But I would not obey
Then finally they said
“Alright. That’s ok.”
“If you don’t want to shower.
If you don’t want to scrub.
If your refuse to spend
Any time in the tub.”
“You’ll be on your own,
My sweet little dear.
And your family won’t
Be anywhere near. “
At first, it was great,
To be on my own.
There’s no one be bug you
When you’re all alone.
I watched what I wanted.
I went to bed late.
And never, not once
Had to finish my plate.
But after I while
I started to miss
My mother and father
And brother and sis.
Mr. Stink was great,
Don’t get me wrong!
But I think I’d been dirty
For a little too long.
So, then I decided
It was time to get clean.
Mr. Stink was in shock.
He thought it obscene.
“Don’t do it!” He said,
His fear starting to show.
“I like being your friend
I don’t want to go!”
But I ignored all his pleas,
And walked up to the sink,
Poured soap in my hand.
“Goodbye, Mr. Stink.”
And he faded from view
As I scrubbed off the dirt.
I felt kind of bad
Cause his feelings were hurt.
And in truth, I do miss him,
And all of his charms.
Luckily, he’s still with me.
— Just under my arms.
I hope you enjoyed this episode. If you did, please check out my picture book, Lost Hallway: Where Do Lost Things Go, now available on Amazon. It's a magical tale of a young boy who discovers a world that contains all lost things. You can learn more at storiesbypeter.com
See you next time!